Inconsistency. It's in my nature

My absence on this blog shouldn't even be addressed anymore. Ok? I do what I want and you and this fast-paced world won't pressure me. You will never make me feel like a failure for my continual negligence, laziness and overall inconsistency. I am better than the social construct that you call the web and I do not and will not feel tied to a deadline; I won't be tamed! You know, it's better to be spontaneous; it keeps readers on their feet right? I like to think of this blog more as a  scholarly journal of sorts. Many will take offense to that statement. Either way, IDGARA (I don't give a rat's ass) because I post and I receive encouragement and everything is fine. That's how most things work, no? The fact that I haven't blogged in a few weeks is a complete understatement in comparison to some REAL failures in our history: Bobby Flay, Ryan Seacrest, anyone? And even they're doing alright.

That said, I'm back! I, like the farmers of America, have suffered from a drought; my drought, however, is a little different, and I don't think I'm experiencing equally harsh repercussions. It's a drought of anything other than working, sleeping, eating, driving, running and chillaxing. (Doesn't that sound like a handful? It's not. Trust me). Serious chillaxing. Books upon books upon books upon Netflix upon food upon nothing. Basically, I've been treating myself. Not to say that writing isn't a treat, but when I'm in an infinite chillzone, blogging ain't my priority. Sorry, folks. (Hopefully my mind doesn't wander to chillzone when the semester starts... but I guess I'm not really REQUIRED to write for The Lamron. I just have to, you know, tear apart everyone else's writing. Just kidding)........

But I feel the rain now; the drought is over and it's time for me to reload and recharge; here we go I'm back and ready to roll! My time off was enjoyable but I can only diddle-daddle for so long until that voice in my head says, "Hey, you're not contributing to anyone or anything by watching all of Seinfeld in four days. Stop that!" And I'm like, shit, you're right, dude! And I experience a complete turnaround and chillzone gets a harsh but necessary makeover. That's excluding these next two weeks during which I plan to plop myself on the couch to watch the most fit, most toned, most sexy and chiseled figures, fine tuned to perfection, competing for my heart. The Olympics, I mean. I do not have a dowry.

But all that is a mindless stream of consciousness that you don't care about. Hehe, sorry! I hope you enjoyed my most inner thoughts. What you WILL care about is what I'm about to share.

It's a beautiful thing that I discovered this week, and I think you all should Google it sometime. An elusive object, you may have heard your grand or great-grandparents talking about it at some point when you weren't listening, but probably should have. No, not the five-and-dime where they bought candy cigarettes and salt water taffy. I'm talking about something bigger, something better. Think worldwide, think:

~@~~}~**~~**nature**~~**~{~~@~

Any of those creatively-placed "at" signs or asterisks help in ringing that bell?

Sure, you've seen it in the movies and you've watched Shark Week; maybe you took a hike sometime this summer; or possibly you and your friends hit up the beach with a 30-rack of BLL (Bud Light Lime). I sure spent a good while in a retirement community, as I shared earlier, in Florida and watched fireworks next to a lake on July 4th. Oh yeah, I also sat in the lawn seats at a concert two weeks ago.

But how often do we find ourselves COMPLETELY immersed in nature? No cars, no roads, sidewalks,  iPods, blogs, condoms, nadda that. Think about it, seriously. Have you taken a trip into the woods lately? If you're nodding - hell yeah! If you're still thinking, then see what I'm saying? If you're just not into nature at all, then you should probably stop reading and continue with your lifestyle. Nothing for you to see here, my Apple-and-everything-technology-and-media-including-but-not-limited-to-Pinterest-and-Reddit obsessed friend.

Mom & Doug's Fantasyland

For everyone else whose interest I may have sparked, I was lucky enough to spend a few nights at Mom & Doug's (See Engineer post) this week; it's a house placed gently into a sparklingly preserved neck of woods that falls among the blanket of trees that covers the rolling hills of sunny upstate NY. The house and its surrounding entities (Adirondack chairs, previously seen lean-to, extra garage full of knick-knacks) disturb as little as possible and coexist with the harmless greenery. Ferns make the best neighbors; their casseroles for our annual block party are awesome (hehe. Was that lame? Sorry).

I also had the privilege of touring an organic dairy farm last week - UH-mazingly cool. Mom's was a little more pleasant when it came to really, you know, "breathing in" the nature, as it wasn't filled with the pungent scent of manure but hey, it's natural! Plus, the cows were really cute and I milked from their udders! Harder than it look, guys. Try it some time.

Nature never, ever, ceases to amaze me. Sunsets, clouds, lakes, rivers, ponds, grass, rocks (nature's rocks), trees, ferns, flowers, sand (nature's sand), leaves, tides, stars, sun, moon. Incredible.

Pocahontas (see right) agreed and said that what she loved most about rivers was that "you can't step in the same river twice." (I am aware that was from the Disney rendition of her story - partly accurate, mostly untrue. They took away some of the violence and terror. That does NOT mean the film isn't beautifully heart-wrenching).
True though, isn't it? Her quote, I mean. An experience or sight in nature will never be duplicated. The walls and ceilings of this giant room around you incessantly change. When you plop yourself into nature, you start in one environment and five minutes later, it's gone. It's incredibly fascinating, breath-taking, and natural. Nature.

To prove my point, I took some hella awesome photos of said nature, and I hope that readers will take the initiative to discover for themselves the beauty of our spinning Earth: They won't disappoint!

Woods. Forestry. (see above) Whenever I walk through vacant woods, I feel like a character in a fantasy novel. A warrior of sorts. (Xena: Warrior Princess?) Or a lost maiden. Idk, maybe it's just because I'm reading Game of Thrones right now (Yeah whatever, guys. I'm doing it and I've almost done it, so chill. It happened, alright? It's a page turner!). But I don't think that has an effect because I definitely felt like that when I roamed the forests at a younger age. And GOT wasn't around in the '90s to early 2000s.

 Clouds. (see left) Constantly shifting and changing. They're like those moving pictures you find at New Age Creations in your local mall. You know, the ones where the waterfalls look kind of, not really, real? Well yeah, like that. But this is real and does not spew the scent of patchouli throughout my car and house.

Check out that awesome sun and water photo on the right. I'm pretty sure that's something that you could StumbleUpon. You know, like "20 Images of Nature you NEED to See Today" and people scroll through in a heartbeat and then Stumble their way to the next ADHD-inducing page. But this one was real. And I stopped stumbling when I got there.

Just awesome. Lakes are the epitome of my love for nature. That's all. Vast, enchanting, and less salt and speedos than the Jersey Shore, lakes are the ideal home base for all ages; dogs included. I even took this one with Instagram to show how hip-hoppin nature can be! See guys, you can wear your Toms here! Free Wi-Fi, too!

So I leave you with that. A pointless post to celebrate my homecoming into the productive 9-to-5 world that just doesn't have a spare minute to pencil these sights in. So long, chillzone and your lush offering of relaxation and comfortable nothingness. I bid you farewell.

(Had to toss the sunset in as a final note. It worked, right? Are there tears in your eyes? Same.)